If You Go Away
has been recorded by many famous singers, but I first became aware of it with
the Neil Diamond* release in 1971.
It's a sad song but I always liked it well enough, singing along with it on the
radio. I also had it on a Neil Diamond album on cassette.
If you go away
On this summer day
Then you might as
well
Take the sun away
...........
The refrain
is simply if you go away repeated four times.
I'm sure
many of you are familiar with the song.
I never
thought a whole lot about the lyrics until, several years later, I stumbled
upon the original version. In French, it was written in 1959 by Belgian
singer/songwriter Jacques Brel. Like it's English counterpart, it has been
recorded by many artists in many languages: 24 to be precise. The English
adaptation was done by Rod McKuen and, sadly, to me, is a mere hint of the
beauty and power of the original French.
That was
when I began actually listening to the English lyrics of If You Go Away.
That phrase is undeniably poignant, but repeating it in sets of three several
times, in retrospect, seems a slight overkill. My life is going to be turned
upside down if you go away ...... if you go away ...... OK, I get
it. Somehow there seemed something slightly irritating about that conditional;
that if. It made me feel like grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking
him. Alright already! Apparently, it's not yet a done deal so stop whimpering
in the corner and get up and fight! Do something about it!
There is a
middle passage of the song which turns hopeful.
But if you stay
I'll make you a day
Like no day has been
Or will be again
...........
But ...
really? Is that it? If I stay with you, I get one wonderful day. That's it? No
more? Business as usual? Hardly a compelling argument. If I'm dying, if that's why
I might go away, perhaps the offer might inspire me to the strength to hang on
just one more day. But to be realistic, it's hardly likely to be the wonderful
one on offer, and even if it were I probably could not delay my leaving for
more than just one day.
No, the
English lyrics do not stand up to too much examination.
But the
French. Oh, the original French. What power. What tragedy. What pathos. We lost
everything when we translated the simple, ever-powerful, ne me quitte pas,
don't leave me, into the somewhat insipid if you go away. (Of
course, I should not even use the word translate. If I had translated don't
leave me into if you go away in my high school French exams, I'd
have flunked for sure. Poetic license can be a dangerous thing.)
Today it's
easy to find an English translation of the original lyrics of Ne Me Quitte
Pas, as opposed to our English adaptation from the '60's. In the early
'80's when I first discovered the original French version, my command of the
language was insufficient for me to gain more than a loose understanding of
most of the meaning. Now I know that the original, for instance of I'll make
you a day etc, was -
I will offer you
Pearls made of rain
Coming from countries
Where it never rains
..........
Slightly
more imaginative. But what did it matter? All you really need is that
gut-wrenching repeated phrase: ne me quitte pas, ne me quitte pas, don't
leave me, don't leave me.
My favorite
version** is by the inimitable Nina Simone,
American singer, songwriter, and political activist. Her throaty, almost
tear-filled, voice, is almost enough to make me cry without benefit of words.
The song haunts me. It leaps into my head each time one more friend or loved
one leaves this earth, which sadly happens more frequently as we age.
To stick
with French, it is a cri de coeur, a cry from the heart.
Ne me quite pas. Don't leave me.
Although
sung in almost a whisper, it is a howl from the depth of the soul.
Ne me quitte pas. Don't leave me.
It is a beg for mercy.
Ne me quitte pas. Don't leave me.
Finally the words sink to their knees in
despair.
Ne me quitte
pas.
Don't leave me.
© January 2017
About the Author
I was born and
raised in England. After graduation from college there, I moved to the U.S.
and, having discovered Colorado, never left. I have lived in the Denver-Boulder
area since 1965, working for 30-years at IBM. I married, raised four
stepchildren, then got divorced after finally, in my forties, accepting myself
as a lesbian. I have been with my wonderful partner Betsy for thirty-years.
We have been married since 2013.
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