Here is the profound question for me: “How do we get to Acceptance?” And by that I mean acceptance of everything, just as it is.
Having read many spiritual books and pursued spiritual quests through various churches and practices and groups, I can say that Acceptance is touted as a goal in most of those endeavors, whether it be Buddhist, New Age, Christian, Integral, or Unitarian studies.
How in the world, in the face of all the news headlines and analysis, in the face of war and terrorism and mass murders, and in the face of everyday problems relating to health or relationships or finances or big weather events, can I ever accept all of that within myself? How, in the face of poverty and loneliness and depression and global climate change and mental illness and diseases and rape and murder and death and man’s inhumanity to man, can I ever get to Acceptance?
What is our goal here? Peace of mind and inner peace.
One of the first things that comes to mind in pondering this big question is a song that I ran across about 33 years ago on a cassette tape put out by Ken Keyes that went like this: “That’s the way it is, by golly, that’s the way it is.”
Perhaps this is the first step to Acceptance, realizing that things are the way they are, and it won’t help anything or anyone for me to be upset or angry or depressed or physically ill over thinking about all of the bad things in the world. It only hurts me.
Does that mean that I don’t care or that I shouldn’t care? Absolutely not. In a huge way it’s a paradox. It requires that I allow my heart to be broken by all of the injustices in the world, and at the same time I accept the fact that injustices are happening. It means that while I strive to find inner peace by acceptance, I still, at the same time, want to make the world a better place.
I believe that this is a good time to consider the serenity prayer that Randy mentioned last time:
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
What a profound prayer that is.
I’m not trying to be a Pollyanna here. I am definitely not saying that if you think only good and positive thoughts that you will have good health and riches and wonderful relationships, and that all of the world’s problems will go away. Although positive thinking has its benefits, that is not the answer in our quest for serenity.
We must deal with the light and the shadow, with the good and the bad, with all of the wonderful people and things in the world and the evil that does exist. And the first step in dealing with it is acceptance of things the way they are.
When I was dealing with a particularly difficult health issue, I remember playing a song by Paul McCartney over and over again in my head: “Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be. Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.”
I think that for me, maybe it can begin with just a moment. For only one minute I’m going to allow everything to be exactly as it is and everyone to be just exactly as they are. I’m going to relax and release my judgment of everything and everyone and let it be. For just a few seconds I will try to relax my body and my mind so that the knot in my stomach can melt and I no longer feel the weight of the world on my shoulders or the anger and fear and concern take over my stomach and turn it into knots.
If I can do it for a moment, perhaps I can do it for two minutes, and maybe even more. Can you even imagine allowing all of your friends to be exactly who they are without wanting to change anything about them? It would be an internal relief, I think, not to want anyone to change anything.
I am remembering three words, each starting with an “A”, that I picked up from my spiritual studies: Acceptance, Allowing, and Awareness. Maybe even Awakening, if we should be so lucky as to reach that point someday.
But first, Acceptance and Allowing, which for a brief time can take me to a sense of peace and calm. And from this place of quiet mind is the place where I can start to reach out and think, “What can I do in my own little corner of the world to make things better?”
© 21 December 2015
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