Road Trip by Betsy

The most interesting thing about my road trip has been the choices that I have been presented with along the way. When the road is straight and does not branch off, die out, or deviate in any way, there are no choices for the most part and one simply follows the road until one has the opportunity to choose a different direction. On my life journey I mostly followed the main road, diligently conforming and meeting societal expectations.

A few times I have been presented with the choice to take a turn and I followed a road that goes in another direction--a road the final destination of which was unknown to me. For a person such as myself who is not a risk-taker by nature, getting off the main road can be a scary thing to do--especially when you have no map and no guide. There are no caution signs on this road. It twists and turns and there are many potholes and hazards.

On the road of life I changed direction when, you guessed it, when I came out. I dare say that was a 90 degree change in direction. And it was a choice. Oh, I know, being homosexual is not a choice, but whether or not one acts on that natural state of being, most certainly IS a choice. What one does with one’s life is a choice. Maybe within certain confines or within a certain structure, but how one behaves, acts, believes, etc. is a choice.

The road trip I took at that time was indeed an adventure. Some of the stopping off points looked beautiful and sometimes fun, but turned out to be quite disappointing. At times I felt as if I were in a foreign country, not understanding the language and certainly not the humor of the people. I actually felt quite the outsider in some of the places along the way. I persisted on that road because somehow I knew the final destination was the place I wanted to be. There were no holiday brochures, however, to tell me what this place was going to be like, but I had all my baggage with me and I had left home, so I continued.

Twenty six years ago I arrived at a spot I really liked. It was beautiful, it was comfortable, it was affordable, it was exciting, it offered all of my favorite activities. What more could a person ask. I still had all my baggage and everything I needed, I was completely satisfied, so I settled in. But that was not the end of the trip.

I do not plan to end my road trip any time soon. It’s just that now I have been traveling with my best friend, my spouse, the love of my life and we always have that beautiful, comfortable place called home to come back to.

(I still have all my baggage.)


© 24 January 2014 

About the Author

Betsy has been active in the GLBT community including PFLAG, the Denver women’s chorus, OLOC (Old Lesbians Organizing for Change). She has been retired from the Human Services field for about 15 years. Since her retirement, her major activities include tennis, camping, traveling, teaching skiing as a volunteer instructor with National Sports Center for the Disabled, and learning. Betsy came out as a lesbian after 25 years of marriage. She has a close relationship with her three children and enjoys spending time with her four grandchildren. Betsy says her greatest and most meaningful enjoyment comes from sharing her life with her partner of 25 years, Gillian Edwards.