Passion, by Betsy

Passion: an intense desire or enthusiasm for something.

Passion is energy, – feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you. – Oprah Winfrey

I have a passion for a few things:  First, for certain people; namely, my loved ones—my partner, my children and grandchildren.

Second, I have a passion for music--not all music.  Mostly for the classical of the baroque, classical, and romantic styles and a little contemporary.  I am very limited in my ability to perform music.  I do like being a part of a choral group and have been doing this for much of my life.  But listening is stirring and inspiring.  I use my iPod when exercising.  Nothing like a Schubert or Brahms quartet to keep me moving and working hard on the stationary bicycle, elliptical or rowing machine. Some music does excite me and gives me energy. Often fellow exercisers ask me what I’m listening to.  When I tell them, they give me a very strange look as if to say, “Don’t you know about rock!  You poor thing.”

My greatest passion is for sports. That is doing, not watching. I am a mediocre spectator fan—well, that’s probably an exaggeration.   I don’t pay a lot of attention to which teams are winning or losing.  Occasionally I’ll watch a tennis match on TV or even a Broncos game.  But given the opportunity I would a thousand times prefer to play, compete, or do most any activity involving  physical action, motion, skill, and/or a desire for adventure.

I must mention one other passion I have.  Now in my later years, I have become aware that I have a great respect – I think it qualifies as a passionate respect for the truth.  Perhaps that is because I spent a good portion of my adult life living a lie.

I have noticed that what may appear to be a person’s passion turns out to be short lived and it is no time before the individual appears to be passionate about something else.  This is particularly manifested in children and young adults.  They jump from one interest to another, I suppose, exploring different areas of interest until one of those areas becomes their deepest passion.

As I was giving this subject further consideration, I came to the conclusion that passion and obsession are very closely related.  I had this thought when I realized that I had made a glaring grammatical error in last week’s writing and I actually read it using the wrong part of speech and didn’t even notice.  The realization hit me in the middle of the night the next night as I lay in bed. I thought, “Surely I didn’t write it that way.”  So I jumped out of bed at 3:00Am and checked my paper.  Yes, I had written it that way and read it that way.  Very upset with myself, I had to wake Gill up and tell her.  “I can’t believe I did that,” I said.  At that moment I realized I have a passion for the correct usage of the English language and its rules of grammar. Understand.  I DO NOT have a passion for writing, but the use of the language definitely intrigues me. This goes back to my high school days when my English teacher, who taught me for all 3 years of high school English, exposed us to very little literature.  Mostly we studied grammar and a little writing.  Most in the class thought the grammar was rather boring, but I loved it.  I guess I have the kind of mind which loves to analyze and that’s what we did.  We analyzed sentences most of the time and learned rules of grammar and word usage. So…..When does passion become obsession?  At 3:00AM.  Ask Gill. Passion becomes obsession when one becomes dis-eased over what she thinks she has a passion for.  (Oh, oh, there I go, ending a sentence with a preposition.) 

© 22 April 2015 

About the Author 

Betsy has been active in the GLBT community including PFLAG, the Denver women’s chorus, OLOC (Old Lesbians Organizing for Change).  She has been retired from the Human Services field for about 15 years.  Since her retirement, her major activities include tennis, camping, traveling, teaching skiing as a volunteer instructor with National Sports Center for the Disabled, and learning.  Betsy came out as a lesbian after 25 years of marriage. She has a close relationship with her three children and enjoys spending time with her four grandchildren.  Betsy says her greatest and most meaningful enjoyment comes from sharing her life with her partner of 25 years, Gillian Edwards.